Wednesday, June 6, 2012

A Tribute To My Daddy



Well its that time of year again, time to give honor to our earthly fathers that I know many of us can say we are blessed to have. I really don't have enough words to describe the love and appreciation, nor can I thank God enough for my earthly father. He has been a rock in my life ever since I was a child. I didn't always realize it back then, you know how kids are, we always think we know more than our parents, but I can't ever remember a time when he wasn't there for me. No matter what I wanted to do even though he knew it would cause me great pain, he never stopped me, he just let me know that he didn't agree with me, but he loved me and he would be there for me if I needed him. My mistakes have caused him so much pain and heartache, not to mention money, yet he just keeps right on loving me and being there for me. From the time I was a little girl I can remember him reading the bible, and praying, he's always trusted God to lead him in all his decisions. He's spent many long, hard days and nights on his knees praying for me and my 3 brothers. One of the greatest things about him is his character, I think how we handle problems, and how we live our lives in front of other people no matter what we are going through says alot about us. He spent many sleepless nights praying for his only daughter to realize the mistake she was making with a man who he said would not even be good to have a cup of coffee with. Months later to bury his 6 year old grandson because of that mistake. For the next few years he spent every dime he had trying to convince the legal system that I was not guilty of manslaughter, although the DA felt that I was morally responsible. The pain was tremendous for all of us, the cost was expensive, yet I still did 7 years in prison. No matter what the cost, he was there to visit me every 2 weeks when we had visitation. He continued to love me, to support me,and to defend me, even though I refused so many times to listen to him. He endured great heartache, yet he always had a smile on his face, he had a way of making people laugh and the strength he portrayed through it all was given by God alone. One year after I went to prison, my mother passed away, now he had lost his grandson, his daughter to prison, and now his wife. My heart ached after my mama's funeral knowing I was going to have to leave him alone. I'm so thankful we serve a God who promises to never leave us nor forsake us. He carried my daddy through so many painful times and even today I watch him as his heart aches for another child who has gone astray. On the outside he laughs and brings joy to others, but on the inside he's hurting so bad. If I could only take away his pain, If I could only give back to him a portion of what he's given me, I would be the happiest person in the world. All I can do is tell the world what a wonderful father he is and always has been. Not only that, he's a wonderful man of God, a man who puts God first in every area of his life, who loves others above himself, and strives each day to be a blessing to everyone. Outside of my heavenly father, he is the greatest man I know and I love him with all my heart. He hasn't read my book all the way through, and although he wants to know how things are going with promotions, it hurts too bad to relive this tragedy. I don't even know if he will ever see this but just in case: Daddy I love you with all my heart, I could never thank you enough for all you've done for me, for loving me, standing beside, and supporting me no matter how bad it hurt or cost you. You are the best father a girl could ever ask for and I will always do my best to be here for you no matter what. Happy Fathers Day and may God abundantly bless you not only for what you have done for me but for what you do for others. I love you very much.

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