Monday, June 25, 2012

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Sunday, June 17, 2012

My Adopted Mom and Dad

I'd like to introduce you to another wonderful couple in my life who I call my adopted mom and dad. Their names are Solomon and Beatrice Williams and I met them during my first few months of prison. Actually Ms. Bea worked in the kitchen and after I had been there for several days sent someone around to see if I wanted to go to work. I had no intention at that time of being there that long mind you, so I just told her I couldn't work because I was going home soon. Of course God had other plans and I ended up being there for 7 years, but there's no doubt in my mind that God put these two special people in my life for a reason. I went to work in the kitchen and it didn't take long to see that this special lady was going to be a blessing to me and definitely someone I could talk to. She assured me from the beginning that if I needed prayer or just needed to talk that she would be there for me. I took full advantage of it too. After a few weeks Ms. Bea introduced me to her husband. When I first met him he was really quiet, didn't have much to say and seemed to me like he was a little stuck up. Ms. Bea told me he was like that with people he didn't know that well, but once he got to know you he would be different. She left the prison after about 11 months to go home and take care of her own business called Unique Touch. I wondered if I would ever see her again, when one day I was out by the back gate at the kitchen dumping the trash and there she was. She came to the fence and gave me her phone number and told me to call her anytime. I guess I really shouldn't have called as much as I did, but once I got started it was just hard to stop. Mr. Williams would just accept the call at first then hand it to Ms. Bea, but after a while he started getting to know me and thats when the fun began. I would call, he would pick up and spend a few minutes telling me he didn't talk to white folks on Sunday, he wasn't home, or there was nobody there by that name. Finally he would accept the phone call and after he talked for a while he would give it to Ms. Bea. I cannot tell you the times I was feeling so down and just hearing his voice cracking those jokes on the other end put a smile on my face, then a much needed prayer from Ms. Bea and I would be ok again for a while. Prison is a lonely place, it doesn't matter if there's 5 or 50 or 200 like we had there, its still lonely. I grew to love these two wonderful people so much I decided to adopt them as my second set of parents. I even had one of the inmates at the prison make me an adoption certificate for them to sign. Of course Mr. Williams swears to this day that he signed it under duress. lol! When I was being released to come home for work release, they told me that I would probably go home and forget all about them. I told them I wouldn't and here they are. Actually, I just talked to him a little while ago and wished him a Happy Father's day too. I love them both so much and talk to them every week. Not many people are as blessed as I am to have 2 sets of parents and loads of brother's and sisters as well. The picture was taken at my wedding to my husband I have today. I love ya'll very much.
Happy Fathers Day
   I want to say I love you to my daddy today. We had a great day, we went to church this morning, and I took him to Captain D's for lunch. He says, "thats a great little seafood place." lol Its been our favorite for many years now. I used to take my son there all the time when he was little. My brother Terry, his wife DeeAnn, and son Lewis met us there too so it was a very nice day. My husband chose o stay home and relax. I guess if thats what you want to do thats fine. Yesterday my brother Roy came down from St. Joe and brought his two boys to visit with daddy, my step sister Lorra came too so all in all he's had a couple nice days with his family. Despite all the wonderful moments we shared yesterday and today, all of our hearts were focused on our younger brother who's over seas right now. He's worked over seas for a long time now and didn't intend for it to happen but drifted away from the Lord. We know that God knows where he is and what he's doing but we haven't heard from him in 3 months. Its hard to see my daddy go through the pain of another child thats gone astray. He went through enough pain 20 years ago when I was going through my battle. I've never seen such strength before, his wife has medical problems and rarely gets out of bed, his youngest son hasn't called him or come to see him in 3 months and still he smiles, he prays, he brings joy to others while dealing with his own pain. Its hard for me to see him getting older every day. I have so many things I still want to do for him, and only God knows how many days or years I have left with him. In fact only God knows how many days or years any of us have left. We take so much for granted everyday, we allow the days to go by and don't even say I love you to those who are important in our lives. Our children come to us to talk or play a game, yet we're so busy doing what we think is more important that we forget they will grow up and be gone before we know it. I heard someone say Father's Day doesn't mean anything to me, no more than Mother's Day, or any other holiday means to me, its just another day. We should live each day as if it will be our last and let those who are closest to us know that they are loved and appreciated.   To all of you out there who's father has gone home to be with the Lord, my prayers are with you. I know how much it hurts to lose someone you love, and no matter how many years go by there's never a day that goes by that you don't think about them. I'm so thankful that the grave is not final, and we as Christians have the joy in knowing that one day soon we'll be reuinited with our loved ones that have gone on before us. God bless every Godly father today and if you're not a Godly father and just happened to end up on my page somehow, I pray that God will reveal himself to you in a mighty way and let you know that he loves you with all his heart and he wants whats best for you and your family. To my husband, my son, all my family, my friends, my church family, and even my new acquaintances, I love you all in the Lord and if I can ever be of help or just lend an ear to a hurting heart, please let me know. God bless.

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

A Tribute To My Daddy

Well its that time of year again, time to give honor to our earthly fathers that I know many of us can say we are blessed to have. I really don't have enough words to describe the love and appreciation, nor can I thank God enough for my earthly father. He has been a rock in my life ever since I was a child. I didn't always realize it back then, you know how kids are, we always think we know more than our parents, but I can't ever remember a time when he wasn't there for me. No matter what I wanted to do even though he knew it would cause me great pain, he never stopped me, he just let me know that he didn't agree with me, but he loved me and he would be there for me if I needed him. My mistakes have caused him so much pain and heartache, not to mention money, yet he just keeps right on loving me and being there for me. From the time I was a little girl I can remember him reading the bible, and praying, he's always trusted God to lead him in all his decisions. He's spent many long, hard days and nights on his knees praying for me and my 3 brothers. One of the greatest things about him is his character, I think how we handle problems, and how we live our lives in front of other people no matter what we are going through says alot about us. He spent many sleepless nights praying for his only daughter to realize the mistake she was making with a man who he said would not even be good to have a cup of coffee with. Months later to bury his 6 year old grandson because of that mistake. For the next few years he spent every dime he had trying to convince the legal system that I was not guilty of manslaughter, although the DA felt that I was morally responsible. The pain was tremendous for all of us, the cost was expensive, yet I still did 7 years in prison. No matter what the cost, he was there to visit me every 2 weeks when we had visitation. He continued to love me, to support me,and to defend me, even though I refused so many times to listen to him. He endured great heartache, yet he always had a smile on his face, he had a way of making people laugh and the strength he portrayed through it all was given by God alone. One year after I went to prison, my mother passed away, now he had lost his grandson, his daughter to prison, and now his wife. My heart ached after my mama's funeral knowing I was going to have to leave him alone. I'm so thankful we serve a God who promises to never leave us nor forsake us. He carried my daddy through so many painful times and even today I watch him as his heart aches for another child who has gone astray. On the outside he laughs and brings joy to others, but on the inside he's hurting so bad. If I could only take away his pain, If I could only give back to him a portion of what he's given me, I would be the happiest person in the world. All I can do is tell the world what a wonderful father he is and always has been. Not only that, he's a wonderful man of God, a man who puts God first in every area of his life, who loves others above himself, and strives each day to be a blessing to everyone. Outside of my heavenly father, he is the greatest man I know and I love him with all my heart. He hasn't read my book all the way through, and although he wants to know how things are going with promotions, it hurts too bad to relive this tragedy. I don't even know if he will ever see this but just in case: Daddy I love you with all my heart, I could never thank you enough for all you've done for me, for loving me, standing beside, and supporting me no matter how bad it hurt or cost you. You are the best father a girl could ever ask for and I will always do my best to be here for you no matter what. Happy Fathers Day and may God abundantly bless you not only for what you have done for me but for what you do for others. I love you very much.