My response to the article in last Saturday's paper about Chris Sepulvado's execution. Hello my name is Yvonne Jones, Author of a Time to Heal the Struggles of a Battered Woman. I'm writing in reference to the article printed on Sat. January 25, concerning Christopher Sepulvado's execution. It simply amazes me what our country has come to. This man has been on death row for 22 years, and still to this day wants somebody to have sympathy enough for him to keep him from having any pain a few short minutes before he dies. I know for a fact that his man was arrested for wife abuse, child abuse, and suspected of killing 2 other children before he was arrested for the murder of this child. He had also been arrested for numerous DWI's, and was at that time driving without a driver’s license. They had been suspended because of those DWI's. There was also a child in a mental institution who was unable to function because of the abuse he sustained from this one man. My question is where was the law when he committed all these crimes? Why was he considered to be just a good ole boy who can't stay out of trouble simply because as he put it "I can talk my way into and out of anything." Don't get me wrong, everybody deserves a second chance, but when you've had as many chances as he's had and still after 22 years on death row his only concern is how much pain he's going to endure for the few short moments before he dies, then it tells me the only thing that changed while he was locked up was the fact that he got older and that’s it. What about the pain and death he caused the people he abused. Louisiana is one if not the main state with the highest crime rate. Its because people like him are able to convince the law that they're pretty good guys, they just have a few problems they need to deal with. The problem is abuse like this didn't just start, its been going on for years now and until people get educated on what to look for in someone who is abusive, and women learn to look for those signs before getting involved with someone, then this cycle will never end. Children don't have a choice in the people we choose to get involved with or marry, but their opinions are usually the last to get heard, if they are heard at all. Abuse is something no one wants to talk about, but the problem is its happening everyday all around us and nobody including the law understands it. Unless you've been in an abusive relationship you won't understand how easy it is to get involved with an abuser, or how hard it is to get out the longer you stay once you are involved. I'm sorry but the reason we have such a high crime rate is people like him know that they can get away with murder, or anything else for years before anything is ever done to them. Why is this one case so important to me, because this was my son he murdered, and I too had to go to prison for 7 and 1/2 years because there was no understanding about abuse and what happens to a person mentally while they are enduring abuse. I too suffered at the hand of this man and my family as well as my son’s family is still suffering today. It’s just sad that after 22 years you can't set a date for an execution because nobody wants the poor guy to suffer a few minutes before he dies.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING Well good morning everyone, I pray that your month and day has started out to be a good one. Time fly,s by fast, it's already the 11th day of the month. Thanksgiving will be here before you know it. I got up with some friends on my mind this morning as well as some family members, and I just felt led to write this blog this morning. Satan is out to kill, steal, and destroy our lives and he always starts in the home. If he can get the husband and wife against each other then it cause's confusion, with each other, the children, and just life in general. God has a prescribed order for victory. What is that you say? Well its what God's word says about any situation, the way he intended it to be. He has a plan for all of our lives and he has an order for everything to take place and when things are out of order, in the home, or anywhere else then there will be confusion and it won't work. Its sad to say but in most homes today, things are way out of order. I'm sorry if I offend some of you by what I'm about to say, but its Bible so don't blame me. Ladies, whether you like it or not, God's prescribed order for victory was for God to be first in your's and your husband's life, the husband to be the head of the household, you are to be next and the children last. There are some homes where that is taking place and if you look at those homes, most of them are or lets say seem to be running smoothly, because nobody except the people living there know exactly what goes on behind closed doors. No home is going to be without problems, thats just life. I also know that many women have no choice in being the head of the household because they're husband's have left, or just to put it bluntly, are just to sorry to take care of their families. Men are not being the leaders God called them to be and that's a huge problem in the home today. You show me a home where the man is reading the word of God on a daily basis, praying with his family, and making sure all of them are in church weekly, then I'll show you a home that's staying together and running alot smoother than most. That is God's prescribed order for Victory. I'm sorry men, but if you want your wife to love and respect you the way God intended then get in the word and find out what God's will is for you as a husband. What men fail to realize is, most women or lets say most Christian women have no problem loving, honoring, or being submissive to her husband if he is looking to God to help him lead his home. When our home's get right and everything is in God's order then things begin to fall into place. When our homes are not in order, our children are not in order, school's are not in order and everything is chaotic. We as a nation have so much to be thankful for. Regardless of what's going on around us, if we have Jesus Christ living inside of us then we have all we need. He is our leader, our guide and promise's in his word that he will take care of us no matter what. One thing I shared in our church bulletin yesterday was, if you have a spouse, be thankful, and love each other because there are many people who go to bed lonely every night. If you have children, spend time with them, because they won't be children for long, one day you are going to look up and they will be graduating high school and getting married. If your parents are still living, honor them and love them because many have lost their parents. For every thing or person you have in your life, someone else doesn't. God wants us to have joy, peace, and live in harmony with each other. He has to be first in all of our lives before there can be any order at all. I pray that everyone has a blessed Thanksgiving, and no matter what kind of problems you are facing today remember God is already there and he knows your every hurt and every need. He is waiting on you to ask for his help. If your home is out of order, let go of the pride and give God and your husband their rightful place in the home and if you're a man, don't abuse that place because one thing is for certain, you will be held accountable to God on how you lead your family. HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE!

NATIONAL DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AWARENESS MONTH As most of you know its National Domestic Violence Awareness month. If you've made it to my page then you already know that this subject is close to my heart because I lost my 6 year old son to domestic violence 22 years ago. There's not a day that goes by that I don't think about my son, and I want to do everything I can to reach women and anyone else who's life is or has been touched by domestic violence. One of the most frustrating things to me is it seems so many people seem to sit in judgement of someone who stays with an abusive person, criticizes, or I've even known some who just flat out disowned their daughters because they refused to leave an abuser. I've also heard many people say, "I would have done this, or I would have done that if it had been me." The fact is no one actually knows how they will act until they have walked in that person's shoes. Everybody was created different, we all have different personalities, were raised different and handle situations differently. I said many years ago that I would never let a man beat on me and now I've written a book sharing my story of abuse. What I want people to realize is, you don't know who you're sitting or standing next too so many times and what they are going through or have been through for that matter. The legal system is the same way, they criticize and judge women who won't press charge's against an abuser, not giving any thought to the fact that the abuser has probably threatened them with death to loved ones or themselves. In my case my ex-husband had been arrested for wife abuse, child abuse and suspected of killing 2 other children other than mine. He was arrested for numerous DWI'S and was driving without a drivers license during the time I knew him because of DWI'S. They kept letting him go because he was what they called a good ole boy who just couldn't stay out of trouble. Well if the law had done their job and tried to learn about domestic violence, and take steps to help make people aware of what to look for, while at the same time taking men like my ex-husband off the streets, I would have never met him and my son would still be alive today. Its important to realize there are more kinds of abuse than just physical. There is emotional abuse, verbal abuse, sexual abuse, and mental abuse. No matter how you slice it, its all abuse and it needs to be stopped. Please help me make people aware of the importance of getting out, telling somebody, or making sure you take your time and get to really know a person before you become so emotionally attached. I am having a book-signing the 24th of this month at the Corner Coffee House in West Monroe. If you would like more information, would like a copy of my book or just need to talk, I will be there from 11:00 am till 2:00 pm. God bless.

Help Prevent Child Abuse April is National Child Abuse Awareness and prevention month. It seems like every time we turn on the television there is a story of some kind of abuse. Although abuse of any kind is bad, abuse to a child is the absolute worst.Children are helpless and innocent and have no other choice but to look at their parents for protection. This subject is near to my heart because 21 years ago, my son and I were the victims of abuse. After my first marriage ended, I met a man who from all actions and appearances was thought to be the man of my dreams. In reality, he turned out to be my worst nightmare. He wined me and dined me with candlelight dinners and roses almost every day. He was very attentive to me and my son in the beginning and made us feel loved like never before. Being convinced that this was a dream come true, I compromised my spiritual beliefs and moved away with him. Very shortly after, the abuse began, first to me, then gradually to my son. One year later, he murdered my 6 year old son. Why does any woman stay in a relationship like this? The answer is for many different reasons. If you look at the statistics, in almost every case of abuse no matter how hard the person tries to get away, the abuser always finds them. Threats of violence and death to other family members are also reasons they stay. In many women's eyes its just easier to stay and take the abuse hoping that things will change, instead of taking the chance of other family members being hurt. Shame, guilt, and fear are all a big part of why women stay.One thing is for certain, it doesn't matter how much you hope things will change, only God can change a heart and that heart has to be willing to change. Many people stand in judgement saying, "I would have done differently if it had happened to me." I said the same thing years before this happened. The fact is,none of us know how we will react in any situation until we are faced with it. Unless you have walked in someone's shoes you have no right to judge. One final thought, we live our lives by the choices we make, good or bad those choices not only affect you, the affect everyone who loves you. If you know someone who is being abused, let them know you are there to help them. it could mean the difference between life and death.

Happy New Year

Well Happy New Year. I guess its a little late in coming since its already February but better late than never they always say. It seems like its been forever since I've even been on here to post anything and for that I am ashamed. I want so much to promote my book and just do what I can to help other women who have been abused, but it just seems like there are not enough hours in the day or enough money in my bank account to spend the time doing what I love to do. Writing is the one thing I want to do the most and really feel like this is what God has called me to do, but its so hard when you don't have the money to pay bills. I'm in bad need of a new laptop as well. Mine has really had it, but no matter what is going on in my life right now, I know that God is in control and he knows whats best for me regardless of what I think or feel. I don't know who will be coming to view this page or even when but if for some reason your eyes to fall upon this page, especially before February 13, 2013 then please keep me and my family in your prayers. For those of you who know the story, you may have already heard that my ex-husband, the man who murdered my son almost 21 years ago is going to be executed on February 13, 2013. For those of you who don't know the story or who have not read the book then through my website you can learn some about what its about. In alot of ways it seems like it was just yesterday, then in many ways it seems like its been a long time. No matter how long its been, the pain will never go away. Oh God has brought me to a place where I can live with it and knowing that I will see my son again one day soon in Heaven definitely helps, but losing a child for any reason is one of the hardest things a person can ever go through. I've had many ask me how do you feel about the execution? Well I have no feelings about it one way or the other. Its not up to me to decide his fate, thats in the hands of almighty God. In the beginning I would have been ready to make him suffer no matter what the cost, but God in his infinite mercy took this person who was so broken and abused, mentally not even able to function, and unable to even realize the reality of my sons death, and showed me that the only way that I was ever going to be able to heal, was to forgive. I didn't want to forgive him of course, I didn't want to forgive myself either but forgiveness is not choice where Christ is concerned. Oh it is, but the bible says that you cannot be forgiven unless you forgive. As hard as it was for me the one thing that made the difference and helped me to make the step towards forgiveness was a message I heard by Charles Stanley. He said, when you harbor unforgiveness, hatred and bitterness in your heart towards another person you become that person's prisoner. I had been this mans prisoner long enough and I knew that I didn't want to be his prisoner anymore. Forgiveness didn't come over night, but just taking that step of Faith and being obedient to the word of God, was what gave me what I needed to forgive him and later to forgive myself. The media announcements have gone out already and they have even notified the victims to see if any of us wanted to attend the execution. Since in the eyes of the law I wasn't considered a victim, they just called me to see if I had a comment. My family has no desire to watch somebody die, especially in this way. I'm so thankful to have such a loving family, one who loves God with all their heart and lets him be the leader of their lives. Did I comment? No I have nothing to say. God is the one who allowed the sentence to be handed down and he is the one who will have the final say in what happens on February 13. I don't know who all will see this, I don't know what you're going through, or even what you've been through, but God does. 20 years ago there was not alot of education on battered women and the DA said he was using me as an example as to what happens to women who stay in abusive relationships. I did 7 years in prison because I was there at the time of my sons death, yet mentally unable to stop it. You may be going through a similar situation right now, or you may know of somebody else who is. Abuse is real and it happens everyday and it doesn't matter how strong you think you are, or what you think you would do in a situation like this, just be aware that the things in life that you are so sure you would not do or allow are usually the things that end up happening to you later. Before I was even married for the first time, I saw a movie on TV about a man beating his wife and I said, "there is no way I would let a man beat on me like that." The important thing to remember is, don't judge a person unless you've walked in their shoes, and don't ever think you're too strong to ever have a tragedy happen in your life. None of us are promised tomorrow, and only God knows what is ahead of each one of us, its up to us to stay close to him and be ready for whatever may come our way. I should have lost my mind back then, and almost did several times but God had a better plan for my life. He knew I needed to be mentally able to share my story so I could help other people. He brought me through the most horrible tragedy of my life, and he is there for you as well, no matter what you are facing today. I pray that if you're facing abuse of any kind right now, trying to get out, struggling to make a decision on whats best for you and your children, that my story will somehow help you see, you cannot change that person, only God can change a heart, and that heart has to be willing to change. Don't stay for any reason, especially if you feel your life or the lives of your children are in danger. Get out, find a friend, a shelter, a church, somebody who will help you and leave the abuser in God's hands.

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My Adopted Mom and Dad

I'd like to introduce you to another wonderful couple in my life who I call my adopted mom and dad. Their names are Solomon and Beatrice Williams and I met them during my first few months of prison. Actually Ms. Bea worked in the kitchen and after I had been there for several days sent someone around to see if I wanted to go to work. I had no intention at that time of being there that long mind you, so I just told her I couldn't work because I was going home soon. Of course God had other plans and I ended up being there for 7 years, but there's no doubt in my mind that God put these two special people in my life for a reason. I went to work in the kitchen and it didn't take long to see that this special lady was going to be a blessing to me and definitely someone I could talk to. She assured me from the beginning that if I needed prayer or just needed to talk that she would be there for me. I took full advantage of it too. After a few weeks Ms. Bea introduced me to her husband. When I first met him he was really quiet, didn't have much to say and seemed to me like he was a little stuck up. Ms. Bea told me he was like that with people he didn't know that well, but once he got to know you he would be different. She left the prison after about 11 months to go home and take care of her own business called Unique Touch. I wondered if I would ever see her again, when one day I was out by the back gate at the kitchen dumping the trash and there she was. She came to the fence and gave me her phone number and told me to call her anytime. I guess I really shouldn't have called as much as I did, but once I got started it was just hard to stop. Mr. Williams would just accept the call at first then hand it to Ms. Bea, but after a while he started getting to know me and thats when the fun began. I would call, he would pick up and spend a few minutes telling me he didn't talk to white folks on Sunday, he wasn't home, or there was nobody there by that name. Finally he would accept the phone call and after he talked for a while he would give it to Ms. Bea. I cannot tell you the times I was feeling so down and just hearing his voice cracking those jokes on the other end put a smile on my face, then a much needed prayer from Ms. Bea and I would be ok again for a while. Prison is a lonely place, it doesn't matter if there's 5 or 50 or 200 like we had there, its still lonely. I grew to love these two wonderful people so much I decided to adopt them as my second set of parents. I even had one of the inmates at the prison make me an adoption certificate for them to sign. Of course Mr. Williams swears to this day that he signed it under duress. lol! When I was being released to come home for work release, they told me that I would probably go home and forget all about them. I told them I wouldn't and here they are. Actually, I just talked to him a little while ago and wished him a Happy Father's day too. I love them both so much and talk to them every week. Not many people are as blessed as I am to have 2 sets of parents and loads of brother's and sisters as well. The picture was taken at my wedding to my husband I have today. I love ya'll very much.